unconsciously, we tend to forgive a person no matter how grave what they did to you. Actually, I was taking a shower (I usually do a self talk most of the time) and I asked myself how am I doing right now. The memories of my past played like a black and white movie in my head. I smiled.. yes I did smile! I was actually smiling for no reason at all which is good, isn’t it?

No one knows how broken and lifeless I was when it happened. I was at the climax and I got too carried away because of my emotions. I never realized that I fell down on the ground so hard and bouncing back was the hardest thing for me to do. I do not have any regrets with all the things I did in the past. It did hurt me-like hell. I never imagined that I was that strong to surpass the pain that burned me inside. Sometimes my past does haunt me but I can honestly say that I don’t find myself crying in between sheets.

I feel better than before. No more lingering feelings towards him and actually, I don’t really care the whereabouts in his life now.

Besides, if let say I’m still in that complicated position.. I would rather be alone and choose my own happiness than compromising it for someone who does not see your worth.

This is the best time for me to enjoy life being independent and spend more time with my family.

If you’re reading this, I do forgive you. Thank you for making my life a one hell of a mess. No offense but I’m just being brutally honest. You know me, right? I’m not wishing that you’ll come back in my life again. I realized that you’re not the one I want to spend my life till my hair turns gray. I’m now seeing some of the reasons why I declined your proposal to marry me. I just hope that you’ll be happy in choosing her. I know that you guys are aware that karma will strike you back after what you did to me in the past.

There will always be a reason why life let us to be one for a while and let this be a lesson for both of us. I did love you-so much and I was ready to give my world to you… but you threw me away.

Sometimes, please think of John. It does haunt me but I’m okay. I hope you understand why I decided to burn the bridge between us.

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